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Page 2: J - Z
Below are just a selection
of quotes I have gathered which I think are worth looking at. They are in
alphabetical order by author and cover a wide selection of topics. I hope
you enjoy them as I think they are all worth reading and remembering.
James, William:
- Almost every man wastes part of his life attempting to display qualities
which he does not possess.
Kauffman, Lionel: Children are a great comfort in your old age -- and they help you reach it faster, too.
Kennedy. John F:- When power corrupts, poetry cleanses.- Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.
Kerr, Jean: - Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house.
Kettering, Charles: - Research is an organized method for keeping you reasonably dissatisfied with what you have.
King, Martin Luther Jr: - When you are right, you cannot be too radical; When you are wrong, you cannot be too conservative.
Knebel, Fletcher: Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
Krushchev Nikita: - Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge where there is no river.
Leverett, Bruce; All major weaknesses have been exposed, analyzed, and replaced with new weaknesses. Lewis, Joe E: - I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. - If you drink like a fish, don't drive. Swim.
Longfellow, Henry Wadsworth: It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong.
Lowell, Dr. A. Lawrence: - Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates....
Marquis, Don - Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing to go through hell to get it. - Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.
Marx, Groucho: - Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. - A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five. - Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. - Outside of a dog, a book is your best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. - From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
Matthew: - Ask and it shall be given to you; seek, and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened for you.
Maugham, W. Somerset - Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. - Only a mediocre writer is always at his best.
McLandburgh, Wilson: - Twixt the optimist
and pessimist, the difference is droll:
The optimist sees the doughnut, but the pessimist sees the hole. Mencken, H.L: - Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard. - Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage. - No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
Midler, Bette: If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to?
Milligan, Spike: Money can't buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
Moore, George: Everybody sets out to do something, and everybody does something, but no one does what he sets out to do.
Morgan, Henry: A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light.
Morgan, J.Pierpoint: - A man generally has two reasons for doing a thing. One that sounds good, and a real one.
Morrow: Dwight, - The world is divided into people who do things--and people who get the credit.
Milton: - Their fatal hands, no second stroke intend (Paradise lost).
Montesquieu: - Author: A fool, who, not content with having bored those who have lived with him, insists on tormenting the generations to come.
Murray, John:
Nunn, Gregory: A conservative is a man who wants the rules changed so no one can make a pile the way he did.
O'Connor, Flannery: - Everywhere I go, I'm asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. -There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
- The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it.
Oppenheimer. Robert: - The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true.
Osgood, Charles: - Being Politically Correct means always having to say you're sorry.
Orben, Robert: - I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
Owen, Wifred: - All a poet can do is warn'. - My subject is war, and the pity of war. The poetry is in the pity.
- There's a helluva
distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is
simply calisthenics with words. Pearson, Maryon: - Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman. Pope Jean Paul: - The truth is not always the same as the majority decision.
Rogers, Will: - What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds. - A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries. - I belong to no organized political party -- I am a Democrat.
Rouchefoucald, Francois de la : - Old men are fond of giving advice to console themselves for being no longer in a position to give bad examples.
Russell, Mark: - The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.
Saki (H. H. Munro) I love Americans,
but not when they try to talk French. What a blessing it is that they never
try to talk English. Searles, David: The tendency of an event to occur varies inversely with one's preparation for it.
Shaw, George Bernard - I never thought
much of the courage of a lion-tamer. Inside the cage he is at least safe from
people. - What is the use of straining after an amiable view of things, when a cynical view is most likely to be the true one? - He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. - Do you know what a pessimist is? A man who thinks everybody as nasty as himself, and hates them for it. - The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post. - Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. - Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life. - The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
Smith, E. I: (Captain of the Titanic) - I cannot imagine any condition which would cause this ship to founder. Modern shipbuilding has gone beyond that.
Stael, Madam de: - The more I see of man . . . the more I like dogs.
Stevenson, Adlai: - In America, anyone can become president. That's one of the risks you take.
Syrus, Publius: Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.
Let a fool hold his
tongue and he will pass for a sage. Szasz, Thomas:
- With sixty staring me in the face, I have developed inflammation of the sentence structure and definite hardening of the paragraphs.
Tomlin, Lilly: -I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific. -Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat.
Toronto Star Newspaper - There's nothing wrong with the average person that a good psychiatrist can't exaggerate. Toledo Blade Newspaper: A great many open minds should be closed for repairs.
- I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight. - Be careful about
reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Providence protects children and idiots. I know because I have tested it. - The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopts them. - "Be Yourself" is about the worst advice you can give to people. - Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething. - By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man's, I mean. - Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. - Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she has laid an asteroid. - A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. - I have witnessed
and greatly enjoyed the first act of everything which Wagner created, but the
effect on me has always been so powerful that one act was quite sufficient;
whenever I have witnessed two acts I have gone away physically exhausted; and
whenever I have ventured an entire opera the result has been the next thing to
suicide. - July 4. Statistics show that we lose more fools on this day than in all the other days of the year put together. This proves, by the number left in stock, that one fourth of July per year is now inadequate, the country has grown so.
Viorst, Judith: - Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia.
West, Mae: - I never loved
another person the way I loved myself.
Wilde, Oscar: - Biography lends to death a new terror. - There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written. - A true gentleman is one who is never unintentionally rude. - Work is the curse of the drinking class. - I am not young enough to know everything. Dont give a woman advice; one
should never give a woman anything she can't wear in the evening.
- One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good reputation. - Either the wallpaper goes or I do (His last words). White, E.B: Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time. Wilding, Michael: - You can pick out actors by the glazed look that comes into their eyes when the conversation wanders away from themselves.
Wordsworth: - Poetry is the breath and finer spirit of all knowledge,
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